Chaning My View

This past week has been, as the Brethren would say, "a revelatory" week. There has been much soul searching on my part and will probably continue to to be much more in the future. That of course all depends upon me. I was asked to make some phone calls earlier in the week. I was to ask for an accounting/commitment of each person I spoke with. For the most part, all went just as I had expected. Then during one of these conversations, there was suddenly a great deal of contention. The direction of the call was painful for me. It hurt my spirit and felt as if I was being personally attacked. After deeper reflection, the contention was not pointed at me personal, but it hurt none the less. It left a heavy pit in my stomach for several days. I have re-run the conversation over and over again in my mind and sleep. I have been trying to understand why this person responded this way. I have been trying to figure out what I could have said or done differently to avoid such a confrontation. I have spent a great deal of time on my knees and in prayer concerning the matter. I have wanted to make sense of it all. Yet, none of it was. Yesterday, I had the opportunity to sit in counsel with my leaders. They were inspired and gave great instruction. It was while I was in this meeting that the Lord spoke to me. He revealed to me what I needed to do. It was not what I expected, but it is what I need to do. For the past several days I had been questioning the other persons understanding and commitment. I was trying to figure out how I could help them change and see things differently. It was during this meeting that I learned how wrong I was. I have no control over what other people believe, how they view things, or what they do. I only have control over myself. There has been great anxiety in my life as to how I might help change this individual. But that is not for me to do. The anxiety needs to be directed in what I need to change. Hopefully those changes will lead to this individual wanting to make changes themselves. D&C 113:8 is the answer to question. A brother wanted to know and understand the gospel more fully. Putting on strength is putting in to action, the power of the priesthood. The priesthood that has been given to man to use according to the dictates of God. I, like many others, have been given this authority. However, it is not mine. It is my responsibility to understand this power, where it comes from, who it comes from, and then use it accordingly. D&C 75:27-28 tells me that as a holder of this priesthood, I need to provide for my family. Provide does not just mean temporally. I must use the power of the priesthood to provide spiritually as well as temporally for my family. I cannot do that unless I understand it. The changes that need to be made in my life do not depend upon some one else. The change that may be required in the life of another cannot be made by me, but possibly influenced by me, if I am doing what I need to do. So what am I trying to say? I need to make changes. I will probably need to make many changes. The anxiety I have felt over one is there for many. Yet that anxiety cannot be relieved unless change is made. It is my responsibility to provide environment where such change for myself and my family can take place. Will everyone change? I don't know, that is up to them. The opportunity to take offense was given this week, to myself and the individual I spoke with. What becomes of it in my life will depend upon me. What becomes of it in the life of another will now depend upon that person. But change has to take place. I must act. I must understand. I must live according to what I understand. How many of you understand that actions that are required of you? How many of you are making the changes to understand? How many of you are willing to change the environment to one that will allow such action? Think about it.