Ask, Knock, Seek Light
I woke last night with horrid images in my head. I thought I had just answered the door, but suddenly found myself still in bed. I turned to the Queen and asked, "Is Tall Man home?" I got a blurred and fuzzy response of, "Not that I am aware of." She promptly rolled over and returned to slumber. I on the other hand could not shake the feelings. Where was he? As of late, he has been coming home much earlier and checking in on a regular basis. I proceeded to lay there and make myself ill. I remember hearing SnakPack just before I dozed off. Puddin had let me know he was in. I even remember helping him do something with his bed. Where was Tall Man?
After 20 minutes or so of trying to rationalize where he was, that he is an adult, that maybe he will be walking in any moment, that I had to get up in just a couple hours to go to work, and churning the acid in my stomach, I finally gave in and sent him a text.
Nothing. I waited for 10 before I called. No Answer.
The questions kept coming. Was he with that Wanna Be Canadian? Did I have his phone number? What if he was with someone else? I searched my contacts for all their numbers. I found one, the Canadian, and sent a text. Then I realized that it was probably an old number since he had just returned from a two year journey.
The Queen was out. I went in to Puddin and woke him up. He was almost as fuzzy as the Queen, but he gave me an updated number. I sent a text and waited.
Nothing. I called. No Answer. I call Tall Man again. It went straight to voice. Where the heck was he?
I didn't want to, but realized that I was going to have to really wake up the Queen and have her join me in this agony. It took a few minutes. As she rolled into reality, she said. "He checked in before I came to bed. He was in no condition to drive so he was sleeping on the Canadian's floor." She then rolled over and floated back to her dreams.
As I drove to work in a haze, an hour an a half later, I now questioned why I did not ask the Queen sooner? Why did I wait so long to reach out to Tall Man, the Canadian, or Puddin? The answer came me with a punch - Pride!
I have been pondering this thought all day. Why are we always afraid to ask? If we don't understand something, why don't we ask? If we need help, why don't we ask? If we find ourselves trying desperately to back paddle, get out of the mess were are in, and plant our feet on solid ground again, why don't we ask?
Life would be so much simpler. School probably would have been easier. Jobs around the house and office would probably get done sooner. We would probably only have to clean our shoes in the repentance process instead of taking a full on power wash.
Christ told both the Eastern and Western Hemishpere to just ask or knock and it would be given to them. He repeats the same promise several times in the latter days, and yet we don't. He tells us to come unto Him and He will lighten our burdens, but we are stubborn.
I encourage you to ask, then knock, and ask again. I know that He will not intrude until we have invited Him in. Sometimes He surrounds us with His angels who are more than capable of assisting us. We can also go to them. Put away the pride. It is OK to have weakness. When we ask, we grow together. Stop making yourself ill. Get out of the mire. Walk on a less burdensome path.
Just ask. It does not matter what it is you are challenged with, maybe it is just the desire or motivation to do something you are fully capable of doing. Ask for the spark. Ask for the light.
That reminds me. As I have been pondering this idea of asking. I faced another silly challenge this week. Roxy has been driving me crazy at night. For some strange reason she has felt the need to be assisted at night when she wants to cuddle with the Queen. Unfortunately, the Queen rarely hears her ask. So I end up having to help. I tell her that if she will come over to my side of the bed, I will assist. She does not move. I end up having to get up, grope around in the dark to find her whimpering voice, and then lift her up to the Queen. This has been happening about every hour all night long.
I had finally had enough. I recognized that I was becoming more and more short tempered. I was barking at anyone who was too loud in my opinion. I came home from work the other day and started trying to build a ramp for her. I was not having much success. That only seemed to frustrate me more. I was really on the edge.
Then I found myself on my knees and I asked. I asked for assistance. It seemed like such a silly thing to ask for. I just wanted to sleep. I needed help. So I asked.
The answer did not come right away. The next day I watched her find her way up on the bed almost effortlessly. She did it several time. I started changing my question. Why didn't she seem to have a problem when I was awake, but whimpered when I was trying to sleep. I was a little thick in the head, but the message finally go through. Which brings me back to my indicator. The answer was the Light. She needed light. It occurred to me that her vision was probably fading. She was not able to judge distance in the dark. She just needed light. Hence we have purchased night lights and it has helped.
We all need the Light.
After 20 minutes or so of trying to rationalize where he was, that he is an adult, that maybe he will be walking in any moment, that I had to get up in just a couple hours to go to work, and churning the acid in my stomach, I finally gave in and sent him a text.
Nothing. I waited for 10 before I called. No Answer.
The questions kept coming. Was he with that Wanna Be Canadian? Did I have his phone number? What if he was with someone else? I searched my contacts for all their numbers. I found one, the Canadian, and sent a text. Then I realized that it was probably an old number since he had just returned from a two year journey.
The Queen was out. I went in to Puddin and woke him up. He was almost as fuzzy as the Queen, but he gave me an updated number. I sent a text and waited.
Nothing. I called. No Answer. I call Tall Man again. It went straight to voice. Where the heck was he?
I didn't want to, but realized that I was going to have to really wake up the Queen and have her join me in this agony. It took a few minutes. As she rolled into reality, she said. "He checked in before I came to bed. He was in no condition to drive so he was sleeping on the Canadian's floor." She then rolled over and floated back to her dreams.
As I drove to work in a haze, an hour an a half later, I now questioned why I did not ask the Queen sooner? Why did I wait so long to reach out to Tall Man, the Canadian, or Puddin? The answer came me with a punch - Pride!
I have been pondering this thought all day. Why are we always afraid to ask? If we don't understand something, why don't we ask? If we need help, why don't we ask? If we find ourselves trying desperately to back paddle, get out of the mess were are in, and plant our feet on solid ground again, why don't we ask?
Life would be so much simpler. School probably would have been easier. Jobs around the house and office would probably get done sooner. We would probably only have to clean our shoes in the repentance process instead of taking a full on power wash.
Christ told both the Eastern and Western Hemishpere to just ask or knock and it would be given to them. He repeats the same promise several times in the latter days, and yet we don't. He tells us to come unto Him and He will lighten our burdens, but we are stubborn.
I encourage you to ask, then knock, and ask again. I know that He will not intrude until we have invited Him in. Sometimes He surrounds us with His angels who are more than capable of assisting us. We can also go to them. Put away the pride. It is OK to have weakness. When we ask, we grow together. Stop making yourself ill. Get out of the mire. Walk on a less burdensome path.
Just ask. It does not matter what it is you are challenged with, maybe it is just the desire or motivation to do something you are fully capable of doing. Ask for the spark. Ask for the light.
That reminds me. As I have been pondering this idea of asking. I faced another silly challenge this week. Roxy has been driving me crazy at night. For some strange reason she has felt the need to be assisted at night when she wants to cuddle with the Queen. Unfortunately, the Queen rarely hears her ask. So I end up having to help. I tell her that if she will come over to my side of the bed, I will assist. She does not move. I end up having to get up, grope around in the dark to find her whimpering voice, and then lift her up to the Queen. This has been happening about every hour all night long.
I had finally had enough. I recognized that I was becoming more and more short tempered. I was barking at anyone who was too loud in my opinion. I came home from work the other day and started trying to build a ramp for her. I was not having much success. That only seemed to frustrate me more. I was really on the edge.
Then I found myself on my knees and I asked. I asked for assistance. It seemed like such a silly thing to ask for. I just wanted to sleep. I needed help. So I asked.
The answer did not come right away. The next day I watched her find her way up on the bed almost effortlessly. She did it several time. I started changing my question. Why didn't she seem to have a problem when I was awake, but whimpered when I was trying to sleep. I was a little thick in the head, but the message finally go through. Which brings me back to my indicator. The answer was the Light. She needed light. It occurred to me that her vision was probably fading. She was not able to judge distance in the dark. She just needed light. Hence we have purchased night lights and it has helped.
We all need the Light.
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