Causually?
I have been thinking a little the past few days. I do this almost every month. Especially at the end. I start to wonder if I have been a good home teacher. Sometimes, I am able to nod my head affirmatively without much hesitation. Other times, I start trying to figure out what I can do to that would qualify as a visit and not look like I am scrambling just to get it done. This month has been one of the latter. Saturday night, the 30th of 31 days, I jumped on my bike and took a ride throughout the ward. I rode up and down each street within our boundaries. This is a task that I don't think I would have been able to do if I did not live in Utah. I stopped and talked to every member of the ward that I saw. It was nice. I didn't get much exercise, I was never really winded, but I really felt refreshed when I got home. And no, I did not get a chance to visit all of my families. The one family that I really went looking for was not home.
Now I am sitting here reflecting on what each of those little visits meant to me. I am hoping they meant something to those who I visited. I was able to talk to a brother who recently decided that he and his family no longer needed organized religion. He allowed me to stop and talk to him as a friend and neighbor. We caught up on how his and my children were doing, where they were, and various changes in their lives. We talked about work and mildly touched upon politics. I rode away thinking how much I missed his fellowship and in a way his friendship. It is unfortunate that we have let his decision get in the way. I started to wonder who was to blame for that him or me? Maybe both.
Today, I rose at the crack of day to participate in the annual ward golf outing. I car pooled with several men who I consider to be neighbors, friends, and brethren in the gospel. However, as we drove along, I realized that I really don't have that much in common with them. I could casually talk to them about sports, work, and children, but none of us really had the same interests. We met several others at the club and divided into teams. I noticed that some wanted to be paired up with others. Whether that was because they were better golfers or whether they were individuals who had common interests, I don't know. I found myself not being chosen. I hoped it was because of my lack of golfing skills and not my company. We ended up drawing colored tees to make it fair. They were stuck with me whether they wanted me or not.
Playing a game of 4 man scramble was fun. It was not long before those brethren realized how unfortunate they were to have me as a player. Not one of them said a thing. As the morning progressed and I warmed up, I felt like I was starting to contribute. It was not until then, that I stopped focusing on me and started focusing on everyone else. I noticed that we were all making little mistakes. I did not matter. We had a great time just being together and strengthening our friendships. It did not matter whether we were the best or not, we realize that we each have different talents and abilities. Advise was asked and conversations were pursued as different topics arose. They are men that I consider to be friends. No different to the brother who has chosen not to associate with us any longer. We did not share our deepest feeling, we may not hang out all the time, but we are all enriched by this casual friendship when we do.
About the 8Th hole, the clouds moved in and it started to pour. We were forced to call it a game and each received rain checks. I found it interesting that on the way home, the conversation was no longer on trivial bits about work, weather, and the price of gas, but rather how good it felt to be together. How good it felt to be surrounded by people who shared common beliefs and were able to lift each other up in a troubling world. We talked about how we could all arrange our schedules over the next few weeks in order that we might share one another company again. We talked about how we needed to do it more often. It was then that I learned, no matter how casual the relationship, how much I contribute or understand. The contact was important too me. It was important to them. We were all edified whether silent or loud. We are just casual friends and neighbors, who need.
Just rambling,
Dad
Now I am sitting here reflecting on what each of those little visits meant to me. I am hoping they meant something to those who I visited. I was able to talk to a brother who recently decided that he and his family no longer needed organized religion. He allowed me to stop and talk to him as a friend and neighbor. We caught up on how his and my children were doing, where they were, and various changes in their lives. We talked about work and mildly touched upon politics. I rode away thinking how much I missed his fellowship and in a way his friendship. It is unfortunate that we have let his decision get in the way. I started to wonder who was to blame for that him or me? Maybe both.
Today, I rose at the crack of day to participate in the annual ward golf outing. I car pooled with several men who I consider to be neighbors, friends, and brethren in the gospel. However, as we drove along, I realized that I really don't have that much in common with them. I could casually talk to them about sports, work, and children, but none of us really had the same interests. We met several others at the club and divided into teams. I noticed that some wanted to be paired up with others. Whether that was because they were better golfers or whether they were individuals who had common interests, I don't know. I found myself not being chosen. I hoped it was because of my lack of golfing skills and not my company. We ended up drawing colored tees to make it fair. They were stuck with me whether they wanted me or not.
Playing a game of 4 man scramble was fun. It was not long before those brethren realized how unfortunate they were to have me as a player. Not one of them said a thing. As the morning progressed and I warmed up, I felt like I was starting to contribute. It was not until then, that I stopped focusing on me and started focusing on everyone else. I noticed that we were all making little mistakes. I did not matter. We had a great time just being together and strengthening our friendships. It did not matter whether we were the best or not, we realize that we each have different talents and abilities. Advise was asked and conversations were pursued as different topics arose. They are men that I consider to be friends. No different to the brother who has chosen not to associate with us any longer. We did not share our deepest feeling, we may not hang out all the time, but we are all enriched by this casual friendship when we do.
About the 8Th hole, the clouds moved in and it started to pour. We were forced to call it a game and each received rain checks. I found it interesting that on the way home, the conversation was no longer on trivial bits about work, weather, and the price of gas, but rather how good it felt to be together. How good it felt to be surrounded by people who shared common beliefs and were able to lift each other up in a troubling world. We talked about how we could all arrange our schedules over the next few weeks in order that we might share one another company again. We talked about how we needed to do it more often. It was then that I learned, no matter how casual the relationship, how much I contribute or understand. The contact was important too me. It was important to them. We were all edified whether silent or loud. We are just casual friends and neighbors, who need.
Just rambling,
Dad
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