Control
Here we are, at the end of another week. It has been a great weekend. I have truly enjoyed conference. It has me thinking of all the things I need to either change in my life or the things that I need to do better. One talk has been on my mind a great deal today. It is President Uchtdorf's talk last night from priesthood session.
As a holder of the priesthood, I recognized the importance to lead by example, serve, and bless my family. However, I am thinking now that I may have those in the wrong priority. Something was said the other day at work that has me wondering. I have had this feeling for a while, but it is coming to a head.
I like to do. I like to be involved. I like to know. I like to feel confident in what I know. Sometimes I think that is causing problems. I don't know everything. I don't like doing everything. I am not always included in those things that are happening. But for some reason, certain people come to me when they have a question. I have felt the sense of resentment building up around me. Therefore, I have been deferring as of late. When someone asks, I suggest that they go to someone else. When a project opportunity arises, I am the first to volunteer other people. I am finding that this has become a double edged sword. I don't have any projects to work on. I feel guilty not having something to do. I feel idle.
Anyway, one of my fellow co-workers made a comment in jest the other day. She was pointing out that my name appeared to be in the Host role of a certain product we use at work. She commented that I was in that role, therefore in control of the meeting. Then in jest said, but we know that already, he always puts himself in that position. I have really been trying hard, but it became evident to me that I have not been trying hard enough.
So, now I am in the dilemma. I started wondering if I do the same thing in my priesthood callings. If so, I am starting to wonder how I can change that. I need to start looking at things as a department or quorum as a whole. It is so hard to distinguish between the two at times. When I am in the world, the world does not want me to think that way. Normally, it is everyone fending for himself and the best comes out on top. I should not think that way in the world or in my calling. I am struggling with that. So, how do I do it? Any suggestions.
As a holder of the priesthood, I recognized the importance to lead by example, serve, and bless my family. However, I am thinking now that I may have those in the wrong priority. Something was said the other day at work that has me wondering. I have had this feeling for a while, but it is coming to a head.
I like to do. I like to be involved. I like to know. I like to feel confident in what I know. Sometimes I think that is causing problems. I don't know everything. I don't like doing everything. I am not always included in those things that are happening. But for some reason, certain people come to me when they have a question. I have felt the sense of resentment building up around me. Therefore, I have been deferring as of late. When someone asks, I suggest that they go to someone else. When a project opportunity arises, I am the first to volunteer other people. I am finding that this has become a double edged sword. I don't have any projects to work on. I feel guilty not having something to do. I feel idle.
Anyway, one of my fellow co-workers made a comment in jest the other day. She was pointing out that my name appeared to be in the Host role of a certain product we use at work. She commented that I was in that role, therefore in control of the meeting. Then in jest said, but we know that already, he always puts himself in that position. I have really been trying hard, but it became evident to me that I have not been trying hard enough.
So, now I am in the dilemma. I started wondering if I do the same thing in my priesthood callings. If so, I am starting to wonder how I can change that. I need to start looking at things as a department or quorum as a whole. It is so hard to distinguish between the two at times. When I am in the world, the world does not want me to think that way. Normally, it is everyone fending for himself and the best comes out on top. I should not think that way in the world or in my calling. I am struggling with that. So, how do I do it? Any suggestions.
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